Keep Moving Forward!

My "sick" face and the Cookies we Made!

Hola familia!!  

Well this week we thought would be different and we would be back in our areas working in the labor of the Lord!  BUT...He had something different in mind and I am still here in Guayaquil--though not as bad as before.  

Tuesday--I couldn´t take it any longer and sent a text message to our investigators and converts and it was a true miracle because like 10 minutes later, Marianela and Gabriel called and it was SO wonderful to hear their voices and their laughter and concern for us--they miss us tons!

THEN--Soheil called and he told us how concerned he had been for my health, that he had been reminded constantly of us and the kicker----HE HADN´T SMOKED OR DRANK IN 7 DAYS!!!!  What?!!!  Let me tell you that before, he has tried to quit and cut it down to one or two a day but that's the most he´s been able to and he hadn´t done any of that in one whole week since we hadn´t even been in Manta to see him!  That was a definite answer to our prayers and a direct confirmation that the Lord will take care of everything.  Also Marixa texted us back and said she had missed us and would wait our return--she´s so great! Even though I felt super sick this day--those bits of news and answers to prayers were miracles to us!

Wednesday--we waited for hours at the lab to bring my labs and exams in and then Hermana Angulo got really sick and we had to go to the emergency room for her!  It was ridiculous how sick we were this day and also how alone, down, and frustrated we felt with many situations.  I felt super down and had to rely on the Lord and prayer and then Hermana Martinez came in the room and it was a tender mercy to talk to her until late into the night.  She is a wonderful, humble, down to earth person from the campo in Paraguay!

Thursday--I felt good enough to study the Ensigns and scriptures like all day.  I never thought I would not get sick of studying church material all day but I literally felt a hunger and desire for the scriptures and the lessons we can learn from them and I LOVE feeling that way!  It´s incredible the difference it can make in your life and the whole new meaning the scriptures take in your life.  I also got to cook a bit and talk to Hermana Angulo who was way down.  I had lots of time to think, learn, reflect, and realize important things for me in my life and about others as well.  Humility and patience is so important!

Friday--I thought of Jess´s bday all day haha!  Not much was different about Friday other than one of the things I was thinking about struck me as interesting. The word for hope in Spanish is esperanza.  The verb that means to wait is esperar and a state of waiting is espera.  How closely related the words of hope and wait/waiting are in Spanish.  And how true that actually is--those two words and actions in our lives are intimately related.  When we have hope, we are waiting for things to be fulfilled in our lives with faith, optimism, etc.  When we wait, we need to have hope otherwise our wait might be in vain or we will go crazy or be super down the whole time and waste our time of waiting, instead of learning a lot while waiting with hope!  

Saturday--I trimmed Hermana Angulo´s hair which was an interesting experience but fun haha and we made lunch for us and Hermana Merida and Hermana Martinez.  After that I felt super sick and then felt way way down.  Satan has a way of making us feel badly when we want it the least.  It´s amazing how much comfort one can feel in true, heartfelt prayer and I learned so much this day personally.  I also had more tender mercies when Hermana Martinez came in and gave me a huge hug and told me how much she loved me and Hermana Merida came in and talked to me for a long long time.  It has been an absolute blessing to get to know those hermanas and a strength when we have needed it.  I also learned a TON this night and had been feeling pretty badly about some things personally and with our companionship with Hermana Angulo and really late at night I went out to where she was looking at the sky and we ended up talking for hours.  I learned so much about the importance of approaching things with understanding even when you don´t understand, approach things with love, pactience, and acceptance.  I learned through this experience that in reality in close relationships like marriage or mish companionships  hard challenges you both face can either bring you together or completely tear you apart.  I learned that it is important to handle these situations, communicate needs, and how we can help each other mutually instead of separately trying to maintain our strength. When we recognize that we are actually drifting apart in hard times, you need to talk, fix it, start again with determination to help each other even though you both are struggling, to lift each other, set goals personally and how to help each other, etc.  It´s amazing that the adversary tries to tell you to work things out separately because you have no more left to give to the other person and one of you has to be strong, etc.  The Lord´s way is so much better and in hard times, I testify if you work with your pair or spouse or best friend or companion or roommate and support each other, communicate, set goals, share the things you learn and are feeling, etc. then you both will be strengthened and edified and the adversary will have no power over you.  I was so glad I listened to the prompting to talk to her and figure out what had changed and that she had felt badly that she had no enthusiasm and felt like she had no more left to give to anyone including herself and we were able to communicate needs, feelings, strength, testimonies, and set goals to improve.  I literally felt married for a second and felt glad that I learned this lesson through experience of the importance in times of trial to go through it together!

Sunday--we were able to enjoy each other´s company, sleep, talk, share more experiences and try to overcome the world in our little house with our studies haha.  We were able to cook lunch for all 4 of us again and then went downstairs to a member´s house to beg their oven so I could make pumpkin chocolate chip cookies with the ingredients Mom sent me a while ago!  It was so great to bake for a teensy bit and share that with the other hermanas.  We played a game with all of us when they finished planning and then got word that they have to go to their other area for a while until further notice so we had to say goodbye to them this morning which was sad!

I got word of who my new companion supposedly will or was going to be and it is an Hermana from Honduras from my group!  Hermana Romero and she and I got along really great when we first got here--we both are excited to work together if we can ever go back to Manta haha.  No I have faith and hope that this week for real we can return and work.  This week has been a challenge and a blessing to learn so much and think and reflect a lot on things of the Gospel and we are so blessed to have the truth in our lives!  Also, challenges can be a blessing if we learn to have a crucible perspective--that we are being refined for something ahead in life.  If we can remember as President Monson said, that ¨The Lord will shape the back to bear the burden placed upon it,¨ then we can maintain that perspective and learn and grow.

Logan´s email inspired me SO much this last week and I really have the best brother in the whole world--the best missionary ever.  All of your emails and thoughts and prayers help me and lift me so much--thank you all!  Being on a mission is the hardest, most wonderful, best thing I´ve ever done and I feel so so humbled beyond belief to be here and have this growing experience.  We can never give more than the Lord blesses us with. 

I love what President Eyring said: ¨To be called to serve is a call to come to love the Master we serve.  It is a call to have our natures changed.¨

My nature is being changed.  I am humbled and feel so much love for my Savior and for this Gospel and for the opportunity I have to see the light of the truth and the Gospel and the love of the Atonement change people´s lives and hearts and marriages.  It is a miracle and we are part of this miracle!  Such a small part of it but the Lord can work through small, weak, humble means.  That´s how I feel and I hope that this week I can return to seeing those small miracles.  For now I am enjoying learning SO much about the Gospel and about myself personally and everyone around me.  I can´t desribe what I feel really or how much this Gospel and the mission means to me now.  I KNOW this is the truth.  I know that Heavenly Father answers our prayers and that there is a reason for everything in this life.  I know He has a plan for each one of us and sends us small miracles everyday.  Look for those and recognize those and most importantly, give thanks for those miracles!  Jesus Christ lives and He loves us so much.  Take upon yourselves His name, use His Atonement and share His light and love with everyone around you.  Thank you for your blessing in my life--I love you so much!  I´m praying for you everyday--thank you for your prayers for me.

Til next week with love!!

Hermana Kenna Bryan

Mom and Dad:  I hope you know how much I love you--I felt badly last week I couldn´t explain more--these comps are so dumb but Dad I did experess my desire to do the exams and did them so I am hoping for results!  I was sad to hear about Erin, your YW but loved your advice to her and know she will be blessed for her obedience.  CONNIE ROMERO!!!  Holy moly--what a blessing!  I started tearing up and loved loved loved hearing about her and your experiences with that--keep me updated.  Dad, I have loved your experiences with reading Divine Signatures and want to read it as soon as I´m back--it sounds incredible and I love the thought of looking at trials and experiences that way as well.  Signed by the Lord for us personally.  I loved Maggie´s mission experience--what a miracle--I cried.  Also I LOVED LOVED LOVED hearing about your man cookoff Dad and Dallin!  Hahahahahahahahahaha I laughed out loud and just smiled and smiled that I have the best, most funny, most awesome family in the whole world.  Way to go you beasts!  Mom, yes I got Ramon´s email from Papa and what a blessing and miracle!  Please let Papa and Odie know how much I love them and appreciate their emails to me and I will write them soon. Love you more than I can express!

Dallin:  I accept your short emails but don´t make them any shorter k? haha dang 9 pounds?? Please don't become a flipping stick you beast!  I need your personal training when I´m back.  Move up to Utah so we can live together and beast it up ok?  Also I´m so sorry about the dry socket--I really hope you are feeling better and it heals soon.  You are in my prayers always buddy.  Share your love of the Gospel with your friends and be the example of Christ I know you are.  You are the best 15 year old I know and I´m so blessed to have you as my brother and example and friend and hilarious dance machine.  Love you!

Logan:  Your emails have inspired me this week as I have read and reread your words and amazing expressions of your love of the Gospel and missionary work. How blessed and intelligent you are--you have a way of expressing yourself that is truly beautiful and the Spirit is SO strong in your words and emails--I can´t even imagine how much it permeates your investigators!!  I have been praying for you and Elder McKay this week a ton and somehow knew it would be challenging for you but that you would learn and grow and become more united and have the strength and energy to keep going.  I hope the snow doesn´t affect you guys too much--how is that?  Also what was up with the commentary of Elder Washburn and my address hmmm??? hahahahaha love you so much--you are in my prayers always.  You are my hero.